Dear Buba,
thank you for sharing that very painful memory. It was interesting when you described what happened to Goran's heart rate when you spoke to him. It proves that people in a coma really can hear us.
 
Much Love to you, Jude

Love is the only way

Thank you Buba, for sharing that very painful, but beautiful memory of your son Goran . . . yes I, like Jude, believe that he was aware of your loving presence and will keep you especially in my heart this day
with much love for you and your family,
and hopes that you will once again
see a beautiful day . . .
sparrow

everything counts... ♥

Thank you dear Jude and Sparrow for your compassionate feelings and kind words.
As Sparrow said kindness means so much,especially in hard times.
 
I am grateful for all your messages,here in forum and in my son`s candle group.
They mean a lot to me and help me to find a little bit of peace every day,
visiting this site.
 
With kindest regards,
Buba,Goran`s mom

Buba, your post on the 30th brought tears to my eyes, especially as I've just replied to a post from someone who lost their auntie and it was coming up to the anniversary,
 
Like you I feel that people aren't just "gone" when they go. The Salvation Army here in the UK say that they have been "promoted", not died, which is nice!  Like they are now in a "higher" place, not just "gone".
 
love and light
Gina and Jackoryx

Dear Gina,
I hope you are right that when we die we are not just gone forever or disappeared,but we are promoted somehow and our spirit is gone on the higher level....
Thank you for your kind words and thoughts.
With love for You and Jackory,
 
Buba,Goran`s mom

Dear Buba,
I have not been on the forum in quite awhile, but I hope you remember me. We posted candles in memory of each other's sons.  
 
I just saw the photo of the apple, and read the story behind it. There really are no coincidences, are there?
 
I know how you feel. It has been one year, four months and fifteen days since the last time I heard my son's voice and there are times when I, too, just want to scream. At these times, life just feels as if it will drag on for far too long...I just want to see Jake again.
 
At other times, my heart is open and I am able to pay attention, ask for help, maybe see a sign. Last July 4 I was having a very hard day. I did some sobbing in the morning then, after I had cleaned my face, I looked at the sky and said to my son, Jake, "I just need a sign. I need to know that you are all right." I walked out of the house and was headed across the yard when something caught my eye in the grass. I backtracked a couple of feet and found a four leaf clover. How I noticed it (as I was walking and crying) I don't know...except that I think Jake put it there for me. It's the first four leaf clover I've ever found. Sounds a little stupid when I write it out, but there you have it.
 
Be well, Buba.
Peace,
Donna

Dear Donna,

Reading your post, I find I just have to reply, sharing a little story. I firmly believe that the four leaf clover you found by chance was the sign from your Son that you had asked for.

About a year ago, there were four of us who used to meet regularly on one of the Gratefulness message boards.  I once compared our friendship to a four leaf clover. Shortly afterwards I stumbled on one, not only once, but twice. I still exchange emails with one of the group - and, believe it or not, as soon I received her first one, I found another four leaf clover!

I have had similar signs from my deceased husband. Let us find comfort in them!

Love and hugs,
Juliana

Dear Buba,
 
May the peace and love you have of your son in your heart and your vivid memories settle into your thoughts today. To share this with us all of us is such a loving act. Thank You! When my sister died on the third day after I was laying on our couch and I saw her hovering over me. She was glowing in a pure white light and said to me that she was ok and that it would be ok. I ll never forget the feeling of that moment. She was love, pure spirit, at least that's the best description I can give of it. Though even to this day I miss her and wish I could wrap my physical arms around her. One of her favorite expression was to live life to the fullest. When I went recently to Hawaii to be at her son's wedding. While I was there I bought a cup of two girls hoola dancing.  When I came home and put the mug out I was astonished when I looked at it. I swear it looks like us. You just never know what may come in if you allow it. It's all a mystery of love. May each day bring you more warmth and love.
 
Love you,
Diane

Grateful to be here!
What a gift and connection builder!
Love and Gratitude,
Love who You Are

Dear Donna,
I remember you and I am so glad that you wrote to me.Our sons were about the same age when we lost them and reading your thread about your feelings I recognize a lot of the same feelings at me.It was too hard for me to speak about my grief for a long time,but it helped me a lot to read other people`s threads,knowing that I am not alone in that what I am going through.I suppose that the time came when I felt that I have to join this forum and talk to other kind people here,who DO understand.It is strange that we can open our hearts to total strangers(at first contacts) but we find it so difficult to talk about our emotions of grief and sadness with our own friends and family!
Dear Juliana,Diane and Donna,I agree with you about signs -it sounds a little stupid when we write it out or say to someone,but they bring warmth to our hearts when we recognize them and feelings that our loved ones are close to us.A lady bug or a lady bird (that little sweet red bug with black spots) is very often a sign from my son and my mother and it appears when and where I do not expect to see it.Once I saw it in my bedroom in the middle of the winter,a few times I found it in my home flowers inside the kitchen and a few days ago in the grass when I was walking home from the shopping...When my Goran was a little boy he liked a lot of much to go to my mom`s and dad`s weekend house in the nature,and there were allways a lot of lady bugs in the grass.So when we were preparing to go there for a weekend he used to say that we are going to the lady bug,that is why I am sure that lady bug must be the sign from him and my dear mom .My mom and my son loved each other very much,and when he was very little,he used to say that he has two moms:me and his grandma.He spent many summer holidays with my parents at "lady bug`s" so I hope that maybe my mom and Goran are somewhere together (my mom passed away 11 months before my son)...
With love and regards to all,
Buba,Goran`s mom

Dear Buba . . .
I have to tell you how much I loved your story of the lady bugs, Goran and your mother. I will always think of it when I see one. You are so right about signs . . . they do always sound "stupid" or "corny" when you tell them, but everyone who has experienced this knows that it is neither of these things . . . we recognize it because we have had it happen too.
I too, think it is sometimes easier to share our deep feelings with people we do not know . . . perhaps we fear judgment from people who are present in our physical lives. I feel that everyone who comes to the forum is a dear friend, to paraphrase something Thankful one said the other day, that they are "friends I know but would never recognize on the street."
Thank you so much for sharing your story
with love . . .
sparrow

everything counts... ♥

Dear Sparrow,
you are so kind and caring person,you allways have kind words for everyone here.
Reading many posts on this forum I realy have a feeling of friendship "in the air".
It is good to know there are many kind and caring people all over the world in this
crazy times ...
with love and regards
Buba,Goran`s mom

Dear Buba
 
I have read your thread tonight with tears....
 
Goran is loved so much ,your love shines through every word you write.
 
I wish you gentle days and peacfeul nights.
 
Sandraxx
 
Today I found a penny,
Just laying on the ground.
But it's not just a penny,
This little coin I've found.
Found pennies come from heaven.
That's what my Grandpa told me.
He said Angels toss them down.
Oh, how I loved that story.
He said when an Angel misses you,
They toss a penny down,
Sometimes just to cheer you up,
To make a smile out of your frown.
So don't pass by that penny
When you're feeling blue;
It may be a Penny from Heaven
That an Angel's tossed to you.
Pass this on to the people who you care
about and who you feel that are angels to you.
An angel is now watching over you.
 
 
 

The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love~and be loved in return♥♥  


 

Dear Sandra,
thank you for lovely poem and kind words for me.I am realy very sorry that you had to experience the same night mare I am going through.But your little Louis will allways be in your heart together with so much love you are feeling for him...
Be strong and brave,you are not alone...
with love and regards,
Buba,Goran`s mom 

ORIGINAL: bm

Dear Sandra,
thank you for lovely poem and kind words for me.I am realy very sorry that you had to experience the same night mare I am going through.But your little Louis will allways be in your heart together with so much love you are feeling for him...
Be strong and brave,you are not alone...
with love and regards,
Buba,Goran`s mom 

 
Thank you Buba even though you are suffering your healings words help me.
 
 Since I joined this forum I  feel I will never be alone.
 
Love and warmth Sandraxx

The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love~and be loved in return♥♥  


 

I am so sad tonight.Christmas Eve brings back happy memories when we were at my parent`s home at dinner table,all family happy and together,Christmas tree glowing in the dark... this is the third Christmas without my son and 4-th without my mom - still unbelievable and so hard to deal with...My dad wanted us to come tonight at dinner but I was so selfish and refused him because it would be so painfull sitting together with family when my mom and son are missing... instead of that I pretend that this is evening as every other day...
 
Buba,Goran`s mom

Dear Buba,
 
I am so very sorry that Christmas Eve is so sad for you! I think of you sitting by yourself with your memories. Try to think of what is being celebrated, Love born into the world that accompanies you in sorrow and joy. Perhaps you want to light a candle and think how from your broken heart so much love for others has come forth.
 
I am with you in spirit!
 
Much love and warm hugs,
Edda

Peace and joy!

Last year at this time, I was planning a funeral for my first born daughter.  And 5 years ago, my sister died the day before Thanksgiving.

Burying my parents was very painful, but nothing compared with people who should have had years left.  Allison was only 37.

Work like you don't need the money,
Love like you've never been hurt,
Dance like nobody's watching and
Your life will be heaven on earth.

Dearest Buba and Eileen,
Please know that I am thinking of you and holding you in spirit.
Spend Christmas in what ever way seems right for you. Buba, I do understand, but maybe your Father is feeling it too? Don't be scared to share your feelings with him.
 
Much Love to you both, Jude

Love is the only way

Dear Buba,
 
Merry Christmas!
 
Love and Light suround you and peace fill your heart!

Grateful to be here!
What a gift and connection builder!
Love and Gratitude,
Love who You Are

Dear Buba
 
Thinking of you right now and your loved ones,Christmas is hard for
 
so many people and I can understand why.
 
Buba ,Goran and your Mother are with you right now as I believe
 
they are holding you up so gently.I wish I could take your family's
 
pain from you but sadly I can't.
 
I am sure your Father is feeling similar thoughts to you and at times
 
like this it's sad to think grief can part us this way.
 
I am sure like my own Mother a hug can work wonders for parents.
 
Take care Buba ,thinking of you love Sandraxxxx