Accepting my GREATness:)

Accepting my GREATness:) (Full Version)

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Greatful -> Accepting my GREATness:) (5/27/2008 2:09:16 PM)
Hi guys! Its been awhile since ive posted here but an amazing miracle has happened (in my consciousness and in my reality) and I really wanted to share it with you all To recap my life a bit for you..... I used to make a living as a singer for many years in Las Vegas and around the world. I was an 'impersonator of Barbra Streisand' but got burned out after 9 years of 'being barb' so I sort of retired /had a mini nervous breakdown in 1996.[8D] I also am a guitarist and songwriter so having to BE Streisand felt very confining to me . I always loved playing my guitar and they wouldnt let me play it in the shows! haa Im not bragging here but some of the critics said I sang better than Streisand and I received many other glowing reviews over the years. My talent was not the issue...I was just experiencing alot of emotional issues, fears, stage frightts etc...OH and an abusive ex hubby....SO I just decided it wasnt worth it anymore to be a performer. Hence my breakdown in 1996. At that point I was not sure what to do with all my immense talents. I really felt that impersonating Streisand was NOT my destiny or my 'calling' even though my family and many people around me thought I should continue doing it. I had no real desire to sing or perform on stage for many many years. I delved instead into visual art. --began drawing pictures (which I had never done before-at age 36!). I was totally enthralled by art and learning all different types of art mediums. I compulsively drew pictures every day for YEARS and years---sort of jumped off the face of the earth and had my head DOWN in my art, hardly ever looking UP. I realize that even though that time in my life mightve been thought of as a BREAKDOWN..I now realize that within every breakDOWN is a BREAKTHROUGH. SO what was happenign to me back then was a BreakTHROUGH!. I clung to my artwork as my 'life saver'. It made sense to me when nothing else did. 4 years later I began selling my art at art festivals. NOw Ive progressed to owning my own art gallery/studio where I make an actual LIVING at selling my art. (VERY GREATFUL/GRATEFUL for that!!) FOr months and months now Ive been dreaming that I was again using my musical talents. Almost every dream was about me being back on stage singing...singing with feeling..and I KNEW I had to sing again. WElllllll to make a long story short TONIGHT I will be doing a live performance at a theater. I used to have some panic attacks and fears surrounding performing but today I feeel so 'calm' knowing that this is the RIGHT TIME to get back to my music. Im a bit older and fatter but heck Im gonna DO IT!! My goal this time is just to have FUN..not to necessarily strive for 'perfection' (which I used to do!). I am a 'recovering perfectionist' you might say. Anyway Ive got my guitar tuned up and I have been warming up my voice. AMAZINGLY I sing better now at age 46 than I did in my younger days. I suppose Im motivated and inspired by entertainers like TONY BENNETT, ANNIE LENNOX etc. who seem to have gotten BETTER WITH AGE! woohoo Im actually very excited about tonights concert and I know it is all in GOds plan. (DIvine plan). At the rehearsal yesterday I really had FUN and I sounded sooooo amazing to myself (and the soundman also mentioned that he'd never heard a voice like mine in his life). It dawned on me taht singing is a 'gift' I was given by God and its time I not hide it from the world (thinking it was my EGO..but instead bring it out into the world and share it with others. THAT is not ego! I feel READY now to stop hiding and to let my light SHINE! Ive been holding back for many years. Maybe I was 'hidng' in my art. I dont know. >>BUT .........tonight I have another chance and Im really looking forward to having FUN. Miracles have happened it seemed while putting this show together too. All the right people seem to have come along to assist me backstage etc. I also would love to eventually produce some benefit concerts for causes I believe in like Animal Shelters, Battered WOmen etc. and sing for 'causes", to use my talents to help the world somehow. Anyway.. Please keep me in your thoughts tonight and thanks soo much for being there! [:D] Michelle (Ill let you know how it went tomorrow!)

Hildegard -> RE: Accepting my GREATness:) (5/27/2008 6:46:18 PM)
Dear Michelle, Thank you for sharing your story with us, and what a story it is! I am happy for you that you'll be singing tonight. I am crossing my fingers and toes (as I used to tell my young patients) for you, and more importantly, say a prayer for you that you may be well received and also have fun doing it. I am looking forward to your report! With every good wish and much love, Edda

Hope coach -> RE: Accepting my GREATness:) (5/27/2008 10:59:34 PM)
Michelle I have visited your web site and heard your song sample and I agree your voice is great I for one being a music lover and having a sense that music is very spiritual am so happy you have decided to continue to share your gift with others I also will encourage you to sing from your heart place and you will always have fun and when you stop having fun or singing from heart pause again until you do Namaste Barbara T Hope coach

Greatful -> RE: Accepting my GREATness:) (6/5/2008 5:28:26 PM)
HI all! It went VERY WELL!! I was amazed at how my voice held up and was even 'better than ever!'. I WAS a bit nervous and had a mini panick attack before going on but it was more like adrenaline..hehe. I realized I MISSED THE STAGE! Anyway the audience seemed to groove. They also said they liked my original songs the best. Some said they were moved to 'tears'..and were 'touched'. I DO feel that this is what I need to be doing now. Singing and sharing my music with the world. Anyway..We met with the theater manager and Im going to be doing a weekly show in there now. Every MOnday night:) Im planning to have FUN and keep in mind that using my talents 'IS GODS WILL"..and I no longer need to hide my light. :) Thanx for all your prayers everyone. ONWARD AND UPWARDS from here. I no longer need to use the 'excuse' that because Im 46 Im too OLD!! Its a silly old belief that I now give up! Im looking forward to producing fun and interesting shows in this theater. Singing duets with others and changing the songs weekly if I want. I love the creative freedom too! Its not about the 'money' anymore for me. Its about the creativity and the FUN! :) Ill keep in touch! Michelle

Hildegard -> RE: Accepting my GREATness:) (6/5/2008 6:47:25 PM)
Dear Michelle, I, as probably everyone else, was waiting to hear how it went! Congratulations! I am glad that all was well, and even more so that you "found your voice" again and feel confident about performing. Please, do keep in touch and let us know about your performances, and how you are doing in every way. Much love and warm hugs, Edda

Thankful one -> RE: Accepting my GREATness:) (6/5/2008 11:14:57 PM)
Michelle, I am so glad for you that your performance went so well and that you found that you did not let the panic take over. It's great to hear that the audience loved it but the real important thing is that YOU loved doing it. Enjoy yourself while you do this singing as life is too short to stifle yourself. [image]http://images.elfwood.com/fanq/n/i/nicoletyson3/alex_singing.jpg[/image]

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