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RE: my mum - 10/12/2007 8:51:36 AM   
sharon

 

Posts: 193
Joined: 6/6/2007
From: England
Status: offline
Dear Edda
I think you right about it been tough love and its not easy to take. Although I should have had a appointment today but she phoned me up this morning to see if I have cut down at all and I haven't. So I now have an appointment next saturday. I have a week to prove that I really do want to stop drinking and if I don't I will get discharged. I am really worried now that come next week that will be it. I really do have to make an extra hard effort to cut down and I am scared that I won't be able to do it. As she said my mood isn't going to improve while I'm still drinking she was quite hard on me but I guess thats what I need and it has made me think. I was so low last night that I nearly took tablets but instead I cut my arm. I haven't self harmed for ages but it was the only other thing I could do to stop myself taking and tablets. I just need to have a reason to stop the drinking and at the moment I can't think of even one. Thank you for listening
sharon
Post #: 121
RE: my mum - 10/12/2007 9:00:39 AM   
sharon

 

Posts: 193
Joined: 6/6/2007
From: England
Status: offline
Dear Jude
I will have a look out for one of those 12 steps books and see if that will help. I need to try something as nothing seems to be helping and I just don't know where to go from here thank you for your friendship
sharon
Post #: 122
RE: my mum - 10/12/2007 9:04:04 AM   
sharon

 

Posts: 193
Joined: 6/6/2007
From: England
Status: offline
Dear glenys
thank you for your message I do appreciate it. it odes help to know that I am not the only one with alcohol issues though its hard to remember sometimes as I do feel as if its just me but it isn't. i don't know whether I will ever win this fight or if it will be too much but I do want to have a happier life than I do now as I don't like the one I've got. I do hope you are ok best wishes sharon
Post #: 123
RE: my mum - 10/12/2007 9:07:41 AM   
sharon

 

Posts: 193
Joined: 6/6/2007
From: England
Status: offline
Dear Blue eyes
thank you for your message I hope you are ok. I am really struggling with this now and it looks like my support will be gone after next week if I don't manage to cut down my drinking and I really don't know what will happen if that happens. I need to find some extra strenght from somewhere to be able to do this
best wishes sharon
Post #: 124
RE: my mum - 10/12/2007 1:24:45 PM   
buttington

 

Posts: 2158
Joined: 6/9/2007
From: UK
Status: offline
Dear Sharon,

Lean on us - we'll give you all the strength we can.

Love Jude

_____________________________

Love is the only way
Post #: 125
RE: my mum - 10/12/2007 3:02:47 PM   
Hildegard

 

Posts: 2653
Joined: 8/30/2006
From: Chicago
Status: offline
Dearest Sharon, thank you for responding! You are worried you won't be able to cut down on your drinking by Saturday. I do think you can because you have a very good reason even though you don't believe it, and that is YOU, a wonderful person striving to be born anew. Take some babysteps - the next time you feel you HAve to have a drink do something else, make a list of things you can substitute - go outside and look at whatever in nature is available, look at the beauty of a flower, the strength of a tree, start reading a book you really like or listen to your favorite music, come here and read the posts in the Grateful Living Forum about books, ideas, quotes that will occupy your mind and give you ideas - even if you can cut down by just one drink a day it would be a beginning and qualify you to continue. Please, stay with it. We believe in you. You are in my thoughts and prayers every day. I keep a candle burning for you!

With much love and warm hugs,
Edda

_____________________________

Peace and joy!
Post #: 126
RE: my mum - 10/12/2007 7:25:00 PM   
Blue Eyes

 

Posts: 16
Joined: 9/19/2007
Status: offline
Dear Sharon,

I've been thinking about you today.  I had the thought that it may help you not to look at the whole week, rather just concentrate on making it through the next hour, then the next, then the next......they will add together and before you know it, you will have made it through the week.

Hang in there!  We are pulling for you, but more important, you have a loving Heavenly Father who loves you and wants to help you.

We are praying for you!

Love,
Blue Eyes
Post #: 127
RE: my mum - 10/14/2007 12:37:13 AM   
garysgirl1010

 

Posts: 97
Joined: 8/22/2007
Status: offline
Dear Sharon,

You have gotten so much good advice from your friends here.  Please do let us help you by coming here every day and finding the words of encouragement that we leave for you.  You do need to take one day at at time, and you need help from your friends every day.

You are worth the effort that this will take.  And you deserve the love that you are denying yourself.  Love yourself.  Let us love you, and let those around you support you as well.  This isn't a weakness, it's an illness, and you can overcome it with help and treatment.

Please hold on tight.

Prayers for Sharon as she struggles with what we know she can overcome with Your help, oh Lord.

Love,
Lolly
Post #: 128
RE: my mum - 10/14/2007 8:11:33 PM   
artemis611

 

Posts: 387
Joined: 7/20/2007
From: Oklahoma
Status: offline
Dear Sharon, I know right now it's hard to see a reason to want to quit drinking.  The ironic thing is, you may have to quit and be sober for awhile before you really see a good reason.  Right now, you can't see clearly what recovery has to offer you.  Give recovery a chance to show you how good things can be.  And you do this by taking one step at a time, one day at a time, one minute at a time.  Thinking about "why" might be keeping you kinda' stuck.  Invest your energy in taking those recovery steps, and try to stop thinking about the "why's" so much (you're getting "analysis paralysis").  Come to the forum often and read inspiring things several times daily.  You have nothing to lose and everything to gain.

Hugs,
Lori

_____________________________

To truly listen is to perfect one's own virtue.
Post #: 129
RE: my mum - 10/16/2007 1:49:37 PM   
celtic star

 

Posts: 453
Joined: 5/23/2007
Status: offline
Hi Sharon
Thinking about you a lot and sending you positive energy and wishes. I am not under estimating how difficult things must seem for you but PLEASE - CHOOSE YOU so that you can have the life you deserve. Love Glenys x
Post #: 130
RE: my mum - 10/18/2007 2:18:34 AM   
garysgirl1010

 

Posts: 97
Joined: 8/22/2007
Status: offline
Thinking of you tonight, Sharon, and praying that we will hear from you that you have had some encouraging days.

Love,
Lolly
Post #: 131
RE: my mum - 10/24/2007 1:53:48 AM   
celtic star

 

Posts: 453
Joined: 5/23/2007
Status: offline
Hi Sharon
Been thinking about you much over the past week. Love Glenys x
Post #: 132
RE: my mum - 10/24/2007 6:31:37 AM   
Star5776

 

Posts: 193
Joined: 6/11/2007
Status: offline
Sharon,

Keeping you in prayers and thinking of you often.

May strength and peace be with you on this walk. You will get through it.
Post #: 133
RE: my mum - 10/25/2007 10:39:15 AM   
Blue Eyes

 

Posts: 16
Joined: 9/19/2007
Status: offline
Hi Sharon,

Just wanted you to know that I have been thinking about you and praying for you.

Don't believe the lies in your head.  God loves you and we love you. 

Please let us know how you are doing.  We miss you!

Love,
Blue Eyes

"Lord be with Sharon and give her strength and hope.  Show her the way."


Post #: 134
RE: my mum - 11/1/2007 11:08:38 AM   
sharon

 

Posts: 193
Joined: 6/6/2007
From: England
Status: offline
I just don't know what to say to all you lovely people who have replied since I was last on here. You are all such caring people and I really don't deserve any of it. I am just in a really dark place at the moment and I really don't think I'm going to come out of it. I have tried so hard to cut down on my drinking but I just can't I am just useless. I haven't been back to my alcohol adviser as I really just didn't see the point. My appointment the other week was cancelled as she was off sick and I was surposed to ring and make another appointment but since I can't cut down there didn't seem a great deal of point seeing her. Now I just don't know what to do or where to go. People always give up me in the end. I think I gave up on myself a long time ago there's no hope left. I so wanted to be able to come on here with some positive news but thats just not going to happen so I will stay away from here from now on you can all do without it. I am not worth thinking about other people are more important than me.
take care all of you
love sharon
Post #: 135
RE: my mum - 11/1/2007 11:26:53 AM   
Hildegard

 

Posts: 2653
Joined: 8/30/2006
From: Chicago
Status: offline
Dearest Sharon,

Not everyone gives up on you, WE DON'T!! Please, come back  regularly, good news or not! You are worth every bit of attention we give you. Stay with us! And, PLEASE, make another appointment with your counselor even though you may think it is of no use. Just do it! You are just as important as anybody else. You may not have hope, but we have hope for you!

I am lighting a candle for you EVERY DAY because you are WORTH IT!

With much love and many warm hugs,
Edda

_____________________________

Peace and joy!
Post #: 136
RE: my mum - 11/1/2007 2:43:47 PM   
buttington

 

Posts: 2158
Joined: 6/9/2007
From: UK
Status: offline
Dear Sharon,
You haven't given up on yourself and neither have we.

Say to yourself every day, "I am worth the trouble of giving up the drink."
You don't have to believe it to start with - just keep saying it. Eventually your unconscious mind will obey your words.

And don't stay away from us. We are here to listen to you, whether you have good news or not.

Love Jude

_____________________________

Love is the only way
Post #: 137
RE: my mum - 11/2/2007 1:08:20 PM   
celtic star

 

Posts: 453
Joined: 5/23/2007
Status: offline
Hi Sharon
I'm with Jude on this one, I don't think you have given up on yourself, you just have a lot to deal with and the drinking is clouding the issue every which way.
Think " baby steps", focus on the positive even if it means really scratching around to identify one - I guarantee there will be one there somewhere!
Will continue to pray and to send positive intention and energy, warmest thought to you this weekend. Glenys x
Post #: 138
RE: my mum - 11/5/2007 9:47:07 AM   
sharon

 

Posts: 193
Joined: 6/6/2007
From: England
Status: offline
Dear Edda, Jude, Glenys
thank you that you haven't given up on me I wish I felt the same. I haven't got any strength left to fight this battle with the demon drink. It is too much for me. I just want to crawl into a hole and never come out. I am feeling so low and I don't think I care about myself anymore, I wish I could feel different but I don't I have just had enough of it all I want it all to go away
sharon
Post #: 139
RE: my mum - 11/5/2007 11:08:36 AM   
Hildegard

 

Posts: 2653
Joined: 8/30/2006
From: Chicago
Status: offline
Dearest Sharon, I am so glad that you have come back! Even WANTING to feel different is a start! We are not giving up on you! Let us be your strength and hope! Just hang in there! And if you haven't made another appointment with your counselor, please, do so even if it seems pointless, as I have suggested before.
From your words to us and to Blue it is clear that you DO care more than you realize.
Come and visit again soon!

Much love and many hugs,
Edda

_____________________________

Peace and joy!
Post #: 140
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