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RE: Today I Feel "Gratitude Challenged...."

 
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RE: Today I Feel "Gratitude Challenged...." - 10/4/2008 10:24:46 PM   
Hildegard

 

Posts: 2720
Joined: 8/30/2006
From: Chicago
Status: online 		Dear Barbara, I can well imagine that your family may make you feel gratitude challendged at times. The desire of an 18 year old to be independent will cool with a simple question, "And how to you plan to pay for your rent, your utilities, groceries,,,,,?" With your husband it might be a case of, "I can't live with you and I can't live without you." You are wise in letting them explore their own paths. Emotional support may more often come from friends than from family. You are so right in deepening your relationship with the One who loves you more than any human being can, the One you can depend on, who gives you whatever you need to deal with the challenges of life. God uses many hands to reach out to you!

I keep a candle burning for you in your old REFF group!

Much love and warm hugs,
Edda

_____________________________

Peace and joy!
Post #: 281
RE: Today I Feel "Gratitude Challenged...." - 10/5/2008 12:26:47 AM   
J1937

 

Posts: 871
Joined: 6/25/2007
From: Austria/Europe
Status: offline 		Dear Barbara,

Having read about your challenges just before I walk into town to attend mass I am taking your cares with me in prayer. May help and comfort come to you!

Much Love,
Juliana
Post #: 282
RE: Today I Feel "Gratitude Challenged...." - 10/5/2008 5:56:13 AM   
buttington

 

Posts: 2244
Joined: 6/9/2007
From: UK
Status: offline 		Dearest Barbara,
My heart goes out to you this morning. You are indeed experiencing mid-life, which is often very uncomfortable as mine was, and I don't seem to be quite out of it yet.

I can identify with what you say about them saying they are going and not, because that is just what my husband said, and he didn't go for 3 years. In hindsight I realize I shouldn't have tried to keep him because I had 3 years of hell. You, I feel, are in a similar position to my daughter. She knows in her heart that she should be with someone more supportive and more on her wavelength etc, and keeps telling me so, but I think she is afraid to leave, especially because of her son. Also, she has not been in employment for 18 years so will find that very hard.

Barbara, keep you chin up and know we all care for you and are wishing wonderful things for you. Yesterday I found a book in a charity shop about Creative Visualization, by Shakti Gawain. It was first written in the 1970s which amazed me, as I didn't know about such things until much later. However, it does work and is just an extension of prayer.
See in your mind's eye what you truly want for yourself. See a picture or scenario as clearly as you can and go back to it as often as you remember it.

With many ugs and Love, Jude

_____________________________

Love is the only way
Post #: 283
RE: Today I Feel "Gratitude Challenged...." - 10/5/2008 5:57:48 AM   
buttington

 

Posts: 2244
Joined: 6/9/2007
From: UK
Status: offline 		Hugs, not ugs !!!!!!!!!!!  Jude

_____________________________

Love is the only way
Post #: 284
RE: Today I Feel "Gratitude Challenged...." - 10/5/2008 6:37:52 AM   
Imenuff

 

Posts: 822
Joined: 3/23/2007
Status: offline 		Dear Barbara, having just returned from my solo "pilgrimage", your comment
quote:

Eric Ericksons stages of middle life at work here and although I do not like it I am really on the mark with facing life will one day be a journey of one, mine, spouses leave or die, children and grandchildren move forward and leave ,it is so important to have my primary relationship with God and know that is the timesless, borderless, universe encompassing spiritual relationship.
really struck a profound cord. In truth, we are always alone and yet in truth, we are never alone. The whole odyssey of these past weeks has taught me that the times I felt most alone and deserted were the times when I found it very difficult to be the "bag lady" dragging her suitcase behind her, feeling like control had been brutally ripped from my hands, not knowing what would happen next. "Live in the present moment; be still and know that I am God." I used to say that the purpose of my odyssey was that I jokingly wanted to "find what I will be when I grow up." Having spent the time, I now realize that is not mine to know now and that was not the purpose at all; rather it was more an experience of completely giving up control, many times not knowing where I would sleep that night, and allowing life to happen, persevering when it seemed impossible to go on, getting past my own ego of what I wanted and how it should be and trusting. I was never alone. In the beginning stages, I was sent a question--how can you change loneliness into aloneness with God? In the end, The Spirit within is all any of us have and can totally count on and She is full of surprises, some that totally test the mettle of our being til we think we are at the breaking point, others that fill our world with wonder and awe, but isn't this what the life of the one we call the Christ was all about and weren't we invited to "Come follow Me?" Know that you are in my heart and in my prayers, not that the relationships work, or that your company works, but that you are completely open to where the Spirit is leading you and that you will have the wisdom, courage, and perseverance to follow. Some of the surprises will seem insurmountable and others will be filled with wonder and awe at how much you are loved and cared for by individuals you have never seen before and probably will never see again. BUT, YOU ARE NEVER ALONE AND YET, YOU ARE ALWAYS ALONE in that our only SURE, POSITIVE, NEVER FAILING COMPANION is not some physical person, but the Holy One who has given us life and walks through it with us.
Blessings on each moment of this day. May they be filled with growth filled experiences that will bring you to a deeper relationship with the Spirit who abides in you.

_____________________________

Shalom(May you be at peace in Body, Mind,& Spirit)

I'menuff
Post #: 285
RE: Today I Feel "Gratitude Challenged...." - 10/5/2008 11:29:32 PM   
Hope coach

 

Posts: 449
Joined: 9/20/2007
Status: offline 		Edda, Betty and Jude thank you for your wonderful support and encouragements
Edda you are so right and the financial conciousness shift has occured as the
grandaughter swooped by me with arms full of shopping bags stating Grandma
I'm not moving right away....I heard you talking and I meant I was going to
move at some time Jude I know exactly how you felt I tell my husband all the
time if you think you need to go just go I won't make a fuss I respect his need
to live alone...what I cannot tolerate is the way he constantly tells me he
must leave .....I'm not afraid to be alone as Betty shared being alone is okay
as long as I keep my spiritual connection you are all so caring and kind to keep
your listening hearts outstretched to me
Namaste
Barbara T

_____________________________

Our Glory Is not In Never Falling
Our Glory Is Rising Every Time We Fall
Confuscious
Post #: 286
RE: Today I Feel "Gratitude Challenged...." - 10/6/2008 8:14:21 AM   
lilsparrow

 

Posts: 490
Joined: 9/15/2008
From: New York State USA
Status: offline 		Dear Barbara . . .
My heart goes out to you. Your situation brings back old pain for me. It really is hard to feel gratitude when your life is in chaos. I do not deal with change or impending change very well . . .
My own situation is stable right now, but as my brother reminds me in our occasional cross-country phone calls, "we are all hanging on by a thread"...which is a scary (but true) thought. I love how Betty spoke of clinging to control, and when control was no longer possible, of finding the joy and freedom of letting go . . . so hard to do...for me at least until the bitter end when my fingernails are bloody and raw from clinging, but oh, the release is sweet.
Please know, Barbara, that you are especially in my thoughts and prayers today, and I light a candle to your brave spirit.
with love . . .
sparrow

_____________________________

everything counts...
Post #: 287
RE: Today I Feel "Gratitude Challenged...." - 10/6/2008 9:23:54 AM   
Hope coach

 

Posts: 449
Joined: 9/20/2007
Status: offline 		Dear Sparrow and Gratefulness family
I am so touched by your outpouring of support who could possibly feel alone???? Not I!
Sparrow thank you for sharing your empathy and understanding of my feelings I'm
sure many of us share similarities of worry, relationship trials too. Today is a better day
I am typing away and as I do believing God makes a way out of no way I'm letting go and
letting God.....he will keep me in this day and all of you as well I so apprecite your candle
and the warm flicker of your heart
Namaste
Barbara T

_____________________________

Our Glory Is not In Never Falling
Our Glory Is Rising Every Time We Fall
Confuscious
Post #: 288
RE: Today I Feel "Gratitude Challenged...." - 10/6/2008 12:36:56 PM   
buttington

 

Posts: 2244
Joined: 6/9/2007
From: UK
Status: offline 		Dear Barbara, I'm glad you feel a little better today. Your post yesterday brought back to me the feelings you must be feeling yourself at the moment. Having a husband or partner keep telling you he is leaving, but not going, is a form or torture I know well.
But you are braver and wiser than me in accepting it and letting him know he is free to go. I could never have done that.
Although I knew I would be OK I was still afraid to be alone. Now I can't imagine any other existence. As Betty says, in reality we are all alone.

Sending Hugs and Love and encouragement.  Jude

_____________________________

Love is the only way
Post #: 289
RE: Today I Feel "Gratitude Challenged...." - 10/6/2008 2:05:09 PM   
Hope coach

 

Posts: 449
Joined: 9/20/2007
Status: offline 		Dear Jude
not so braver and wiser than you only had the privelage to learn from my own dear MOTHER'S FEAR of being ALONE drove her to enslave herself my father and us until she found God and knew she was never alone all those years Today I was rumbling through the piles on my desk and my hand touched a small paperback book my daughter gave me before she left to go to Vegas and live I looked at it today really looked at it and here is what I am holding "Creative Visualization" Shakti Gwain No such thing as an accident the irony here is I strongly used visualization years ago when my daughters were younger and much of what I am and do today is what I visualized well I'm sending you my gratitude and pouring a coffee and going to read. And as for me I am going to continue to leave others to their own path and keep visualizing a new joyous prosperous one for me to share with anyone open to sharing my path
Namaste
Barbara T

_____________________________

Our Glory Is not In Never Falling
Our Glory Is Rising Every Time We Fall
Confuscious
Post #: 290
RE: Today I Feel "Gratitude Challenged...." - 10/6/2008 3:24:30 PM   
buttington

 

Posts: 2244
Joined: 6/9/2007
From: UK
Status: offline 		Barbara, you've made my day!!!!!! More Synchronicity at work.
I've known about Shakti Gawain for years, but only now am I reading one of her books. I have found so many inspiring books in charity shops, (as you say, no such thing as an accident) they just seem to jump off the shelves at me.

I stand by what I said about you being brave.

Love, Jude

_____________________________

Love is the only way
Post #: 291
RE: Today I Feel "Gratitude Challenged...." - 10/7/2008 7:26:48 AM   
lilsparrow

 

Posts: 490
Joined: 9/15/2008
From: New York State USA
Status: offline 		Dear Barbara . . .
I am glad to hear that you are feeling better today.
Wishing you many blessings for another "better" day . . .
You are in my thoughts and prayers.
"Keep it simple"
with love. . . .
sparrow

_____________________________

everything counts...
Post #: 292
RE: Today I Feel "Gratitude Challenged...." - 10/17/2008 8:58:00 PM   
mamaluvskids

 

Posts: 168
Joined: 7/28/2008
Status: offline 		Today I have felt "gratitude challenged". I have been so sick for the past 2 weeks. I have been vomitting and running to the bathroom and have lost lots of weight. I thought I was getting better and now I am fighting another infection on top of the 1st one. I hope that the doctor's can help me soon as it's been hard for me to be there and help my kids and my family when I have been so sick. Please pray that I will keep a positive attitude and get better soon!
Post #: 293
RE: Today I Feel "Gratitude Challenged...." - 10/17/2008 9:05:49 PM   
Hope coach

 

Posts: 449
Joined: 9/20/2007
Status: offline 		Oh Dear
I do hope you will improve I understand how conflicted feeling ill is with children and having to rely on others to do what you most love doing.. mothering However I learned too late in life that self care is caring for others if we are not strong and healthy there is no one we can help Im a believer in second opinions if any physician is seeming unsure or my symptoms dont resolve within 2 weeks or at least lessen I ask another . Mamaluvskids dont wait too long and dehydrate...I will pray for you and light a candle for you as well
Namaste
BarbaraT

_____________________________

Our Glory Is not In Never Falling
Our Glory Is Rising Every Time We Fall
Confuscious
Post #: 294
RE: Today I Feel "Gratitude Challenged...." - 10/17/2008 9:31:04 PM   
mamaluvskids

 

Posts: 168
Joined: 7/28/2008
Status: offline 		Barbara, thanks for your sweet get well. It has been defanately hard for me. I thought 2 weeks ago I just had a virus when I was throwing up and running to the bathroom. I guess it's partly my fault because I didn't go get help till this week. They thought that I had appendicitis and had me go to the hospital for some tests. Thank God they have ruled that out but now they think that I have gastroeneritis (but they are not 100% sure yet) and that it could eventually turn in to apendicitis. They also said that it could take me awhile to get better. I had to go back again today and now I have bronchitis and pneumonia along with a bacteria and viral infection in my stomach and that gastroeneritis. The doctor said that I was real dehydrated and that my blood pressure was way too low. He said that if I don't get better that I will have to be admitted to the hospital. Who knows? I just want to feel better. I turned 30 Tuesday so needless to say this has not been a good birthday. It has been kind of difficult for me because I have felt so bad and weak and I have 5 kids that need me alot. I have 3 small ones under the age of 4. I do have my mom that helped me a day this week (which I was so thankful for) but I can't expect my family to keep helping me. Plus, if you are not use to dealing with 5 kids then it can get pretty hectic. Thanks again for your kind words.
Post #: 295
RE: Today I Feel "Gratitude Challenged...." - 10/17/2008 10:20:17 PM   
Hildegard

 

Posts: 2720
Joined: 8/30/2006
From: Chicago
Status: online 		Dear Joya, I am so sorry that you are having so many acute medical problems. Listen to Barbara! Your children need you! Don't delay getting admitted to the hospital if your doctor advises it. The sicker you get the longer the recovery will be. I can't even imagine taking care of 5 young children. If your mother can't help as much as necessary, perhaps you can turn to your faith community or talk to a social worker at the hospital so something can be worked out! Perhaps a home maker can be arranged for you to allow you to get more rest. You need to take care of yourself!

Belated birthday wishes to you for better health, strength and much joy in the year to come!

I'll light a candle for you and keep you in my prayers,
Much love and warm hugs,
Edda

_____________________________

Peace and joy!
Post #: 296
RE: Today I Feel "Gratitude Challenged...." - 10/17/2008 10:46:27 PM   
Hope coach

 

Posts: 449
Joined: 9/20/2007
Status: offline 		Edda that is great suggesstion Joya you can call the local Catholic Charities if you have one or some similar agency under Social services etc you may have to work at it but they can be found all cities usually have them well I will check out any resources in your area I may find.....please take care Edda you are a dear person and so caring I can see why you were called to the healing profession I wish many chlidren could have known your care however I'm sure you earned your time to relax and enjoy life with Leon How is he doing these days? we all send our healing prayers for him as well you are truly a role model and proof that attitude of gratitude equals longitude
Namaste
Barbara T

_____________________________

Our Glory Is not In Never Falling
Our Glory Is Rising Every Time We Fall
Confuscious
Post #: 297
RE: Today I Feel "Gratitude Challenged...." - 10/17/2008 11:06:35 PM   
mamaluvskids

 

Posts: 168
Joined: 7/28/2008
Status: offline 		Edda, thanks for you and the others care and support along with your suggestions. I do have my husband that helps some but he has a full time job and he has some health issues of his own. Like I told Barbara, I am going to have to admit that I need help and that I can't be super women. Sometimes I feel so guilty to ask my family or friends for help. Like I said before if you are not used to being around 5 kids, it can be stressful. Especially tending to 3 littles one that are not even 2 years apart in age. I have a 11 year old that has ADD/ADHD and he alone can be a handful! Thanks again for all the love and support.
Post #: 298
RE: Today I Feel "Gratitude Challenged...." - 10/17/2008 11:23:12 PM   
Hildegard

 

Posts: 2720
Joined: 8/30/2006
From: Chicago
Status: online 		Barbara, thank you for your kind words, and for asking about Leon. As I noted in my reply to Sharon, he is doing as well as can be expected at 93 years of age and after hip replacement surgery in the beginning of the year. He is able to walk with the aid of a cane or a walker, and ride his electric scooter. He has age related health problems which are manageable. His vision is very poor. He is blind in one eye following a vein occlusion several years ago. A cataract in his other eye reduces his vision, but no one is eager to operate on the one better eye. As I told Sharon, we make the best of the simple things that we can enjoy.

Now you need to take your own advice and not overextend yourself in all the wonderful things you do!

Much love and warm hugs,
Edda

_____________________________

Peace and joy!
Post #: 299
RE: Today I Feel "Gratitude Challenged...." - 10/18/2008 12:03:02 AM   
Imenuff

 

Posts: 822
Joined: 3/23/2007
Status: offline 		Joya, not feeling gratitude challenged in the midst of being that sick would seem almost impossible especially with five little ones around. Prayers and candles go out to your drs for wisdom that they find what is wrong and causing these problems. I do agree wtih Barbara, when you have been that sick for that long, if one dr can't take care of it, a second opinion might be a good idea. Belated Happy Birthday. Perhaps when you are back to normal you can celebrate with your family. With regard to having your family keep helping you, I used to feel that was about individuals helping me until someone told me that when you help another, the blessing is on you, when you allow them to help you, they receive the blessing. Edda is right about getting someone in to take care of the children so that you can use all your energy toward getting better. Care of self is so very important especially with your little ones. Better to have a couple of days in the hospital than end a couple of weeks. Do let us know how you are doing and for your own well being and that of your children, take good care of yourself and please allow someone else temporarily to take care of your children.

May the blessing of healing and good health quickly fill your life.

Edda, I am sorry to read that Leon has so much trouble with his sight. It is understandable that after all the trouble with his other surgery, the drs wouldn't even consider surgery on his good eye. Blessings on your prayer group tomorrow. May it be a very calming and peace filled break.

_____________________________

Shalom(May you be at peace in Body, Mind,& Spirit)

I'menuff
Post #: 300
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