RE: Laughter and the Positive Effects (Full Version)

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Marie M. -> RE: Laughter and the Positive Effects (5/1/2008 11:59:50 PM)

THE CROW AND THE PITCHER
 
[image]http://i240.photobucket.com/albums/ff134/alucard__hellsing/Crow.jpg[/image]
A THIRSTY Crow found a Pitcher with some water in it, but so little was there that, try as she might, she could not reach it with her beak, and it seemed as though she would die of thirst within sight of the remedy. At last she hit upon a clever plan. She began dropping pebbles into the Pitcher, and with each pebble the water rose a little higher until at last it reached the brim, and the knowing bird was enabled to quench her thirst.

    Moral: Necessity is the mother of invention.

    An Aesop Fable






Marie M. -> RE: Laughter and the Positive Effects (5/2/2008 12:25:31 AM)

  The Ant and the Dove
 
[image]http://i180.photobucket.com/albums/x2/thesmittenimage/dove.jpg[/image]

An Ant went to the bank of a river to quench its thirst, and
being carried away by the rush of the stream, was on the point of
drowning. A Dove sitting on a tree overhanging the water plucked
a leaf and let it fall into the stream close to her. The Ant climbed
onto it and floated in safety to the bank. Shortly afterwards a
birdcatcher came and stood under the tree, and laid his lime-twigs
for the Dove, which sat in the branches. The Ant, perceiving his design,
stung him in the foot. In pain the birdcatcher threw down the twigs,
and the noise made the Dove take wing.


One good turn deserves another

An Aesop Fable





Marie M. -> RE: Laughter and the Positive Effects (5/2/2008 12:40:19 AM)

The Fox and the Crab
[image]http://i214.photobucket.com/albums/cc76/bunz48001/daytona%20beach/daytonabeach141.jpg[/image]
 
 
A Crab one day grew disgusted with the sands in which he lived. He decided to take a stroll to the meadow not
far inland. There he would find better fare than briny water and sand mites. So off he crawled to the meadow.
But there a hungry Fox spied him, and in a twinkling, ate him up, both shell and claw.

Be content with your lot.
 
An Aesop Fable




Marie M. -> RE: Laughter and the Positive Effects (5/4/2008 12:39:33 AM)

My Spell Checker

I have a spelling checker
It came with my PC
It plane lee marks for my revue
Miss steaks aye can knot sea.
Eye ran this pome rite threw it,
Your sure reel glad two no.
Its vary polished in its weigh --
My checker tolled me sew.
A checker is a bless sing
It freeze ewe lodes of thyme.
It helps me right, awl stiles two reed,
And aides me when aye rime.
Each frays come posed up on my screen
Eye trussed too bee a joule.
The checker pours ore every word
To cheque sum spelling rule.
Be fore a veiling checkers,
Hour spelling mite decline,
And if were lacks or have a laps,
We wood be made to wine.
Butt now bee cause my spelling
Is checked with such grate flare,
Their are know faults with in my cite,
Of non eye am a wear.
Now spelling does knot phase me,
It does knot bring a tier.
My pay purrs awl due glad den
With wrapped words fare as hear.
To rite with care is quite a feet
Of witch won should bee proud.
And wee mussed dew the best wee can,
Sew flaws are knot aloud.
Sew ewe can sea why eye dew prays
Such soft wear four pea sees.
And why I brake in two averse
By righting want too pleas.





Marie M. -> RE: Laughter and the Positive Effects (5/4/2008 1:11:59 AM)

Abbott and Costello
 
[image]http://i8.photobucket.com/albums/a29/champ1985/Philips%20Misc/img162.jpg[/image]
 
Abbott and Costello - Who's On First Video
 
http://photobucket.com/video/abbott%20and%20costello/atresc1/WhosOnFirst.flv?o=3


[image]http://i43.photobucket.com/albums/e367/PhillyPartTwo/Baltimore%202007/Orioles%20Game/whowhatidontknow.jpg[/image]





Marie M. -> RE: Laughter and the Positive Effects (5/4/2008 1:27:03 AM)

[image]http://i102.photobucket.com/albums/m117/smoknbunny/white_and_hairy_spiders_red_fly.jpg[/image]
   The furry spider giving the hairy eyeball to the white spider




Marie M. -> RE: Laughter and the Positive Effects (5/4/2008 1:45:04 AM)

[image]http://i132.photobucket.com/albums/q3/deanreevesi/firefly.jpg[/image]
The Firefly Lights His Lamp
 
Although the night is damp,
The little firefly ventures out,
And slowly lights his lamp.
 
 
Unknown author
 
 




Marie M. -> RE: Laughter and the Positive Effects (5/4/2008 2:20:55 AM)

[image]http://i272.photobucket.com/albums/jj165/PrayingBlack/PRAY.jpg[/image]
              "Pray always and never become weary."
 
 
Luke, Chapter18
 
 




Marie M. -> RE: Laughter and the Positive Effects (5/4/2008 2:12:03 PM)

[image]http://i91.photobucket.com/albums/k302/sangaree_KS/Garden%20Junk%20Inspiration%20Pictures/M_yellowbirdhouseladder.jpg[/image]
              Every Birdie Welcome!
 




Marie M. -> RE: Laughter and the Positive Effects (5/4/2008 2:43:07 PM)

[image]http://i253.photobucket.com/albums/hh61/natattack19/1206913641618.jpg[/image]
                               "Oh Sing A New Song Unto The Lord"

                      
 




Marie M. -> RE: Laughter and the Positive Effects (5/6/2008 10:45:47 PM)

[image]http://i256.photobucket.com/albums/hh184/beebee8464/funny-1.gif[/image]
            Jump for joy,
      Come skip with me.
           Don't be coy,
         Let's merry be!

 
 
~Jessi Lane Adams




Marie M. -> RE: Laughter and the Positive Effects (5/6/2008 11:04:49 PM)

This song has previously been posted on T.O.'s, "Videos which are uplifting", "What a Wonderful World." This video version of the song is done with hand expressions to the song. Cute.

http://i187.photobucket.com/player.swf?file=http://vid187.photobucket.com/albums/x13/Planet-X-Productions/Funny%20and%20Crazy%20Clips/WhatAWonderfulWorld.flv&sr=1">




Marie M. -> RE: Laughter and the Positive Effects (5/6/2008 11:48:01 PM)

[image]http://i201.photobucket.com/albums/aa248/lovely_idiot2007/Stunning%20pixes/Allalone.jpg[/image]
                  Think positively about yourself....
    ask God who made you, to keep on remaking you. 
 
 
~Norman Vincent Peale





Marie M. -> RE: Laughter and the Positive Effects (5/7/2008 12:30:02 AM)

Computer Mouse Stories  [image]http://i96.photobucket.com/albums/l167/luxie10981/mice.jpg[/image]



Several years ago I was at a computer show demonstrating software, I explained how to use the mouse to point to things on the screen. As I walked around the room making sure everyone was doing ok, I saw one woman holding her mouse to the Mac's monitor moving the mouse around on the screen.


One customer held the mouse in the air and pointed it at the screen like a TV remote, all the while clicking madly.


A user called in to say her mouse was only moving left and right and not up and down. This was a common fault with that particular model of mouse, so I brought a replacement over, swapped it out, and she tried it out.
"Nope, same problem," she said, and showed me. For left and right movements, it worked fine, but when she moved the mouse up and down -- that is, physically off the desk and into the air -- it just didn't work at all.


I was teaching a user about Windows.
  • Me: "Move the cursor up to the menu line. . . . Move the cursor to the menu line. . . . Move the mouse up to move the cursor up to the menu line. . . ."
  • Still, nothing was happening on the screen. Finally I looked over her right shoulder to see what she was doing. She had raised the mouse literally up -- about a foot off the desk.


One lady, in an Excel class, was having a terrible time with the mouse until the instructor noticed that she was literally pointing with her finger and clicking the mouse.

  • Tech Support: "Ok, to access the files on the disk click the mouse on the picture of the disk."
  • Customer: "Nothing happened. I told you, I've already tried this."
  • Tech Support: "Ok, do it again. Is the mouse moving?"
  • Customer: "Yep."
  • Tech Support: "On the screen?"
  • Customer: "Yep."
  • Tech Support: "Now click twice on the picture of the disk."
  • The consultant hears two clicks.
  • Customer: "Nothing."
  • Tech Support: "Ma'am, double click once more for me."
  • The consultant hears the two clicks again.
  • Tech Support: "Ma'am, are you hitting your screen with your mouse?"
  • Tech Support: "Ok, now click your left mouse button."
  • Customer: (silence) "But I only have one mouse."


And another user was all confused about why the cursor always moved in the opposite direction from the movement of the mouse. She also complained about how hard it was to hit the buttons. She was quite embarrassed when we asked her to rotate the mouse so the tail pointed away from her.


While training over the phone I heard, "Oh, wait. Uh oh!!" I asked repeatedly, "What? What's happening?" expecting to hear smoke was pouring out of her computer.
Finally she recovered enough to scream, "My keyboard's in the way! I can't move my mouse!"


Once, working with a UNIX X-Windows imaging system, a user requested aid because her mouse pointer was stuck on the right side of the screen. Over the phone, I told her to move the mouse to the left, and she should be fine. After a slight pause, she told me my suggestion had not worked.
I walked over to have a look. When I arrived, I politely showed her that I meant she should slide the mouse over the mouse pad -- not lift it up and sit it down on the left side of the keyboard.


We taught first-years how to cope with using a computer. We had one chap who spent ages with the mouse upside down, using it as a trackball, before he came and asked us if there was a better way.

  • Tech Support: "Ok, now right click."
  • Customer: "Which one's that?"
  • Tech Support: "On right side off mouse."
  • Customer: "I'm left handed."
  • Tech Support: "Ok, well, look at the mouse and click whichever button you normally don't click on."
  • Customer: "That's the left for me."
  • Tech Support: "Ok, click that."
  • Customer: "With which hand?"


We had a member call up with the usual connection problems and the tech rep on the call was wondering why it was taking the member unusually long to do the simplest task such as selecting an item from the menubar. The member said that her cat had eaten her mouse ball and she had to move the cursor by putting her finger in the cavity where the mouse ball used to be and moving the rollers manually.

My mother wanted to look up something on the Internet. Having never touched a computer let alone the Internet, I showed her how to use the mouse and the significance of the hyperlink. She said, "I want to see what this page says," so I told her to put the mouse pointer over the icon and click the left mouse button. She successfully navigated the cursor to the icon, picked up the mouse to eye level, looked at the button she wanted to click, clicked it, and asked, "Did I do it right?"





Marie M. -> RE: Laughter and the Positive Effects (5/7/2008 1:02:55 AM)

[image]http://i38.photobucket.com/albums/e118/thenameistrina/youvegotmail.jpg[/image]

Email Stories, How does it work???      


  • Customer: "I get this error when I check my mail. It says, 'There are no new messages."


  • Customer: "If I want somebody to send a reply to my email...should I include a self-addressed stamped envelope along with it?"

    • Customer: "Help! I'm stuck trying to send you an email."
    • Tech Support: "Ok, what kind of problem are you having?"
    • Customer: "I'm not sure where to buy stamps for my email."
    • Tech Support: "You don't need stamps. Email is free!"
    • Customer: "You sure it won't bill me for it? If so, I can send you money."
    • Tech Support: "It's FREE."


    -Once, I had a caller insist I come visit her at home, because she had all kinds of errors on her computer. I took the 25 minute trip and discovered that the "errors" were spam emails that had found their way to her inbox. Essentially she paid me for deleting her junk mail.


    -A few years back I was working at the helpdesk for an Internet provider where people could get a cheap email account.

    • Customer: "Hi, I want to change my email address."
    • Tech Support: "Of course, sir, may I ask why?"
    • Customer: "I think it's too long."
    • Tech Support: "Can you tell me what your email address is now?"
    • Customer: firstnamelastnamestreetadresszipcodeandphonenumber@****.


    • Customer: "I tried sending email to 1.404.000.4567 but the emailer wouldn't let me."
    • Tech Support: "Um, that's a telephone number."
    • Tech Support: "How may I help you?"
    • Customer: "I'm writing my first email."
    • Tech Support: "Ok, what seems to be the problem?"
    • Customer: "Well I can get the 'a'. But how do I put the circle around it?"


    -Overheard in a class:
    • Student: "I'm so glad you're giving this email class. I can't wait to find out how to send a fax from my cell phone!"


    -Doing phone support for a software company, we had a customer that needed an update to our program. We told her that we had placed it in her mailbox, and it was there waiting on her to pick it up (our customers had "mailboxes" on our dial up server). She told us it wasn't there, so we asked her to check again just to be sure. She said ok, put the phone down, and was gone for about five minutes. Finally she came back and said, "It's still not there. I knew it wouldn't because our postman only comes around 11:00am." She had walked outside and checked her street mailbox.


    -Cut directly from our support log:
    > jim,  when  i  send e-mail!  do i use ink,  like if i was writing?  i
    > had to put in new ink in
    > my printer, so i  was  wondering  if  e-mail  use'es  ink.
    >   thank you






  • Marie M. -> RE: Laughter and the Positive Effects (5/7/2008 1:20:02 AM)

    A Great Story
     
    Some years ago, on a hot summer day in south Florida, a little boy decided to go for a swim in the old swimming hole that was behind his house. In a hurry to dive into the cool water, he ran out the back door, leaving behind shoes, socks, and shirt as he went.

    He flew into the water, not realizing that as he swam toward the middle of the lake, an alligator was swimming toward the shore.

    In the house, his mother was looking out the window. She saw the two as they got closer and closer together. In utter fear, she ran toward the water, yelling to her son as loudly as she could.

    Hearing her voice, the little boy became alarmed, and made a U-turn to swim to his mother. It was too late. Just as he reached her, the alligator reached him. From the dock, the mother grabbed her little boy by the arms, just as the alligator snatched his legs. That began a very incredible tug-of-war between the two.

    The alligator was much stronger than the mother, but the mother was much too passionate to let go.

    A farmer happened to drive by, heard her screams, raced from his truck, took aim, and shot the alligator. Remarkably, after weeks and weeks in the hospital, the little boy survived. His legs were extremely scarred by the vicious attack of the animal. On his arms, there were deep scratches where his mother's fingernails dug into his flesh; in her effort to hang on to the son she loved.

    The newspaper reporter, who interviewed the boy after the trauma, asked the boy if he would show him his scars.

    The boy lifted his pant legs. Then, with obvious pride, he said to the reporter, "But look at my arms. I have great scars on my arms, too. I have them because my Mom wouldn't let go."

    You and I can identify with that little boy.

    We have scars, too. No, not from an alligator, but the scars of a painful past. Some of those scars are unsightly, and have caused us deep regret. But, some wounds, my friend, are because God has refused to let go. In the midst of your struggle, He's been right there, holding on to you.

    The Scripture teaches that God loves you.

    You are a child of God. He wants to protect you, and provide for you in every way. But, sometimes, we foolishly wade into dangerous situations, not knowing what lies ahead. The swimming hole of life is filled with peril ~ and we forget that the enemy is waiting to attack. That is when the tug-of-war begins.

    If you have the scars of His love on your arms, be very, very grateful. He will not ever let you go.

    Please pass this on to those you love. God has blessed you, so that you can be a blessing to others. You just never know where a person is in his/her life, and what they are going through.

    Never judge other persons scars, because you don't know how they got them.

    Also, it is so important that we are not too selfish to receive the blessings of these messages without forwarding them to someone else.

    Right now, someone needs to know that God loves them, and you love them too ~enough to not let them go!!!

    God bless!

     
    Unknown Author
     




    Thankful one -> RE: Laughter and the Positive Effects (5/7/2008 2:40:05 AM)

    Marie,
    I liked the alligator story very much. It is helpful for me to think about the scars I and others may have because God held onto us.

    I am personally very grateful right now that through my recent personal situation that God never let go of me. And I too have scars to prove it!

    Let's hold on to our love for God who loves us so much and use that love to hold on to those we love.

    [image]http://i168.photobucket.com/albums/u175/Duchessaa/1131144_ph.jpg[/image]




    joeharmony -> RE: Laughter and the Positive Effects (5/7/2008 9:42:32 AM)

    Here's something that will either give hours of fun, or drive you nuts.http://www.vectorpark.com/etc/spider.html
    Try holding the mouse button down for a while & letting it go.




    J1937 -> RE: Laughter and the Positive Effects (5/7/2008 10:51:40 AM)

    Joe,

    I´ll better stop before it drives me nuts! [:D] And I haven´t got hours to spare! But it´s fun. Thanks!

    Juliana




    Marie M. -> RE: Laughter and the Positive Effects (5/7/2008 4:30:57 PM)

    Thankful one, the story of the alligator and the boy has much meaning, and it was good for me to read after a trying time lately. Thank you for the beautiful picture of the cherubs, It is by Michelangelo? I have a picture of the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel that I look at quite regularly that has those Angels,  in it. Thank you T.O.

    Bless you
    Marie




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